the drugs like me

around a year ago, i'd spent a month barely sleeping
barely eating
and barely functioning moment to moment.

around a year ago, my anxiety was up
my self confidence down
and my sense of stability was all shook up.

around a year ago, i was searching for friends
searching for myself
and keeping my calendar as full as possible so i didnt have to stop to think.

around a year ago, i started taking lexapro
5mg a day (i know, nbd)
and it slowed my head down and made me feel normal.

and now, a little more than a year later
i feel ready to stop taking it
and every doctor i know says don't do it
but i did it
2 days ago
and so far i feel fine.